
I don't understand this.. When someone is new to BDSM, instead of saying "Hello, I am new to BDSM" they say "Hello, I am new to 'The Lifestyle'". Yet, they are not in a 24/7 Lifestyle situation.
Don't get me wrong, thoes people out there who want to use BDSM in the bedroom to enhance sex only - that's fine. Each person, couple, master, slave, dominant, switch, bottom, submissive, and top need to define BDSM in the way it works for them, and use it accordingly.
I think that the main reason why bedroom BDSM practitioners like to use the term "Lifestyle" instead of "BDSM" is because they want to look like they have researched this a bit. They want it to look like they know what they're talking about.
They read so many websites and blogs which tell them that if they aren't into this for the 24/7 long haul, then they aren't really "kinky", or into BDSM. They are told that they are vanilla and need shunning.
Well, if any of thoes newbies are reading this right now, I want you all to know this:
There is no shame in not living BDSM as a "lifestyle". It is OK to just use it here and there as you see fit. Another thing you will come to understand is "My kink is not your kink, but your kink is OK."
Live, learn, love.. And enjoy! And for goodness sake, don't let some elitist prick hole dictate how you play. 